Saturday, June 26, 2010

The day I saved a wedding.

Everyone grab your party hats and get excited because it is birthday week. Baby Boy has his very first birthday on Tuesday and in honor of this very memorious day, I am kicking off the Party Planner.  I am going to make you laugh with tales from the old days, teach some great tricks and together we can host the best parties in town.

Prior to Mommahood I worked insane hours, ran around in heels for hours on end and in my opinion I was paid to put our fires. I loved it, I miss it some days...my job today is so much better. Lets set the stage a little...

Its a beautiful Saturday in May and it was one of my client's Big Day. We had planned an outdoor ceremony and cocktail hour with an indoor reception in a Barn. Our main concern leading up to her day was the weather and besides a little humidity, it was a perfect day.

The guest were arriving, the drinks were flowing and everything was set. This couple met at a poker party over a joke about Star Wars and had used this piece of their past to theme their wedding into a Poker Star Wars Party. The wedding cake was a focal point, it was supposed to be more cute than wedding and in my personal opinion looked liked tiered version of the Mad Hatter's hat. Oh did I mention it was fire engine red and black with stripes and polka dots. I am standing in the kitchen plating appetizers and giving my staff a run down of how food, drinks and dancing will go and all the sudden my assistant is standing in the room looking like someone had dropped dead.

Assistant: "We have a problem, a big one. First, I promise no one was near it. It just happened. "
Me: "Okay, spill it" (I didn't have time for novels the wedding was due to start in 25 mins)
Assistant: "The cake fell on the floor"

I stared and then ran from the kitchen to cake. I may have flew, I was fast. The cake had crumbled to a mess of fondant and the top layer was smashed into the toile backdrop, that layer had died and the rest was in intensive care.

I literally just started picking up the pieces and trying to figure out how fix this mess of a cake. I am barking orders.
"Do not let the bride come down here, do not!
I need cocktail swords. I need poker chips and I need a second pair of hands.

So in 20 mins, I managed to get the dead layer out of sight, the table cleaned up, the cake back together by using about 100 cocktail swords to hold the pieces together and covered the holes and dead places with poker chips. The groom watched the whole thing go down in shock and I think total fear that his bride would go batshitcrazy if she knew this had happened.

The bride walked right passed the cake as she headed to the aisle, the bride and groom cut the first slice (me and the groom winked) and I whisked the mangled cake into the back to cut it and remove all the swords. I wasn't in the mood to call 911 for eating injuries.

She had no idea anything had happened until the next day when her hubby told her and then on her way to the airport she called me, cried and thanked me. I said it was my job and then vowed to never ever let another bride pick such a crazy looking cake.

2 comments:

Captain Cleavage said...

*slow clap*

Well played...yes yes.

I wish our wedding planner (ahem...mom!) had been as cool and level headed.

Lets just say d and I ended up having a ceremony with 4 people...me,him,officiant,photo guy.

@JessEsco said...

Wow. Very well done.