I used to love running. It was in a word, relaxing. There was nothing like a run in the crisp morning air, my ipod blaring and all my frustrations melting away. For me running was better than therapy, I could clear my mind and the world always seemed a little brighter after. Then I quit... it wasn't a conscience decision. I just stop having time for it and before I knew it the thought of running was scary, overwhelming and flat out exhausting to think about.
I had always said I would work-out during my pregnancy, that I was going to be that healthy momma. But when you do not plan on the pregnancy a lot of your best intentions become just that, an intention that did not happen. I walked a lot and that certainly helped my delivery... I pushed all of 15 minutes ((fist pumps the air))! But then he came and life took over and I did nothing. Not a damn thing for months and now at 10 months old, I am seriously disgusted with the reflection in the mirror and embarrassed that I don't own clothes that fit.
I have talked a lot about doing Weight Watchers, signing up for Boot Camp, etc. Guess what? I haven't done a thing but run my mouth. Apparently I need a motivation so I found it. Besides the looming bathing suit season and I want to be skinny enough to sport a bikini again, I needed something to get my butt in gear. If I have learned anything this past 10 months is that I need to exercise. It is my magic weight loss secret. I can eat a lot or not I am not going to gain or lose weight but if I work out, if I move, it works I get skinny. Well, I hope because I used to be skinny and I used to work out.
My motivation is my wedding dress, a beach, a setting sun, my husband in a white linen suit and a photographer. I am going to retake my wedding photos. Why would you do that you ask? Because I HATE mine. I think they are terrible, it rained so it ruined my hair, the sun was grey and honestly my photographers just didn't live up to their hype. My hair was matted by my veil and no one told me. That along with a few other issues, I look at the pictures and I honestly get mad. Every girl has their wedding dreams and one of mine was to have an amazing picture where I look the best I ever have with my husband staring at me with serious love and lust and have it big in my house. I want my daughter (if I have one) to look at it and say "Mommy was beautiful" the same way I did when I looked at my Mom's. I would just stare at it for hours and dream about my day.
So here's to running again I am a week into it and if it kills me I am going to renew my relationship with running and get myself beautiful so that I can put that dress back on and get a fantastic photo or two.