Thursday, April 19, 2012

Its been awhile

Posting here seems to fall lower and lower on the priority list these days. Trying to find the time to sit and write and then edit it so it makes sense never gets done. I have wrestled with the idea of just shutting it down and thus removing it from the back of mind that I need to do it. Life is busy per usual. I honestly do not expect it to slow down until we have an empty nest. Today its baby/toddler days and as those wind down school days begin. Sports and other extra curricular will gear up and I fully expect to wake up one day and be watching one of these boys walk across the stage at graduation. If the last 3 years have taught me anything its that it flies by. All struggles will pass. As soon as you think you have it figured out, things change. It is life. But it is my life and I love each and every day I am given in it.

I am not into parenting books. I did not read pregnancy books and did not read baby books. I have a strong gut reaction to child rearing that I trust and I choose doctors that I have total faith in. If I am worried I ask them. Thus reading books seemed to cloud my personal judgement so I have historically chosen not too. But, EJ has entered into a phase the last six months that left me at a total loss. We have always been aware that EJ was at a high risk for ADHD. Craig has it and it seems to travel through families through the male to male kids. Many of the early signs did not show up in EJ so we wondered for awhile if we were in the clear. We still do not know for sure. Its hard to tell prior to the age of five but my gut says yes this is something we will be dealing with. Regardless he has a "difficult" temperament and every day was battle for awhile. I was at a total loss so I called the doctor and asked for some guidance. He pointed in the direction of a book called "The Difficult Child" and it truly revolutionized our daily lives. It helped me see the best way to handle him. All I can say if your kid makes you want to pull your hair out strand by strand or makes you feel like failure its worth looking at. Warning it written by a doctor and at times feels slightly clinical. But power through it is good.

2 comments:

@JessEsco said...

I'm not a book reader either. I mean I've bought them because they sound good in theory, then I never read them. I probably need help because Allie needs to sleep better. But cry it out just won't work. And I won't try it.

I'm glad that the book is helping you!

Ali said...

Even if sporadic, I do enjoy your posts! AND, I just bought that book. Miles is definitely difficult in his being shy and needy, and Felix in his loud and refusal to go to bed. I actually thought about ADHD the other day! I am not one who wants to quickly label my kids or put them on meds, but I'd love to have more guidance and strategies on how best to handle behavior. Thank you!